tight_wet_lips
Gift PremiumOdd yet delightfully intriguing. Morbid yet very very sweet. Sarcasm is part of who I am.....deal with it.
- 104 years old
- Female
- Joined 20 years ago
- 227,165 views
tight_wet_lips's Blog
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Sunday, February 3, 2013, 9:02:51 PM- I am such a dufus! | ||||||
While drinking hot soup, I burned my tongue...of course I had my tongue out while heading for the ice cube tray. Since my tongue was dry from panting.....the ice got stuck on my tongue. Not a good combo, let me tell you. DUFUS! *****On another note, we are working on a link so the blog challenge viewing will be easier. Stay tuned for updates! | ||||||
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Sunday, February 3, 2013, 4:12:48 AM- The women will understand this. | ||||||
Before I went shopping, I prayed to the Blue Jean Gods. Tonight, I was blessed to have found a pair within an hour of shopping! The women know how hard the Blue Jean Gods can be on us. Thank you Blue Jean Gods! I bow down to you! | ||||||
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Saturday, February 2, 2013, 6:10:38 PM- The neighbor has a new girlfriend. | ||||||
This one grunts when she orgasms. Which is funny, because he grunts too. It sounds like two gorillas going at it. I didn't get to sleep in this morning because I had the Los Angeles Zoo outside my window. Each time a new one comes along, I crack up. | ||||||
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Friday, February 1, 2013, 3:15:07 PM- I gave up trying to figure out my dreams. | ||||||
Tom Cruise and I were ball room dancing. Funny? Yes. But not as funny as when he took off my shoes and started to paint my toe nails. | ||||||
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Friday, February 1, 2013, 6:34:28 AM- For all of you! | ||||||
xoxo | ||||||
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Thursday, January 31, 2013, 5:36:18 PM- A laugh to start my day. | ||||||
Have you ever heard of the saying "People Will stare. Make it worth their while"? I have and with my sense of humor, you never know what will happen. I guess the guy in Starbucks didn't appreciate my humming. He just kept staring and staring. So what do I do? Something sexy? Disgusting? Funny? hmmmmmmm? Ladies, word to the wise...if you want to get a man to stop staring at you....pull your panties out of your ass. (even if they are imaginary panties) | ||||||
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Thursday, January 31, 2013, 3:43:47 AM- A debatable subject. | ||||||
I have always respected those who work. No matter the job, if you work hard, you will get my respect. But if you don't put your best foot forward and slack off, then I will wonder why you feel entitled to praise. Tonight I went out to dinner. My friend and I sat down at the table and as I was looking over the menu, I noticed at the bottom of the menu, in small print the words: "12% gratuity automatically added to bill" I asked the waiter if that meant for parties over a certain amount of diners. He told me no, it was for all who dined. Call me awful, but I will not eat anywhere in which the restaurant TELLS me how much I will tip. This means the waiter/waitress would get tipped even if they sucked. What if a customer didn't see the small print and tipped the usual? They would be tipping on top of an automatic tip! I find that offensive. I decided not to eat there. I admire those who work in the food industry because at times they deal with morons. But, again....I refuse to reward someone who possibly could show me lousy service. | ||||||
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Tuesday, January 29, 2013, 5:24:25 PM- Ok, Fess up! Who has the tasty and delicious wings? | ||||||
$65K in stolen chicken wings still at large, cops say. 19 hrs ago: [Source] msnNOW.com, updated 24 hours a day. We already know that we're facing a chicken wing shortage right as the Super Bowl approaches, putting the nation's enjoyment of the big game in dire jeopardy, but now some dudes may have gone and made things worse. Dewayne Carl Patterson and Renaldo Cortez Jackson were charged with theft when police say they stole nearly $65,000 in tasty frozen chicken wings from a cold storage facility in Doraville, GA. Cops claim Jackson used a forklift to load 10 pallets of the wings onto a rental truck while Patterson worked as a lookout. But the real problem: Police still don't know where the stolen wings have been stashed! --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I think some of you NN Members look highly suspicious. Do I need to get a search warrant? | ||||||
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Tuesday, January 29, 2013, 1:58:56 AM- A surprise in the mail. | ||||||
Last Saturday, I received a package. A former partner (dept, not personal) sent me this beautiful silk black/pink scarf. No reason, the card was simple "Missing The Dork" Of course I will take a picture of me wearing it. But not like this picture........lol. The use of the word "dork" was used by me as a term of endearment to those I liked. | ||||||
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Monday, January 28, 2013, 4:20:40 PM- Remember the parking space bandit? | ||||||
The young woman (see page 5) who tried to feign ignorance on NOT seeing the parking sign clearly marked for me? Well, she did it again. Not to me though. But I was there. She had pulled into a different space that was not hers. This space is right next to mine...lol. I was driving past her as she was getting out of her car. I rolled down my window and again said "pardon, but that is not your parking space" You could tell she was gearing up for the look.......that same stupid look she gave me before. Anyhoo, she turned around and had a simpleton look on her face and was about to say...."Oh I didn't know" But all she got out was "Oooh, I di" She saw it was me and stopped dead in her words.............lol..LORDY! When she saw it was me, her words went from "oooh I di" to "fuck!"......Of course she quickly moved. I do not care for women who purposely act stupid. Just be smart and get the respect you deserve instead of the pity you don't want. | ||||||
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