tight_wet_lips
Gift PremiumOdd yet delightfully intriguing. Morbid yet very very sweet. Sarcasm is part of who I am.....deal with it.
- 104 years old
- Female
- Joined 20 years ago
- 227,165 views
tight_wet_lips's Blog
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Friday, December 13, 2013, 10:41:48 PM- Yes, it's true. I take myself out on dates. | ||||||
I was having lunch with a few people and made mention that I was going to take myself to the movies and see the new Hobbit movie. One of the dimwits in another office asked me why? lol...? Why? Dimwit: OMG! You're going alone? Won't you feel foolish? Me: OMG! Don't you feel foolish saying such things? Guess what people? I also take myself out to eat! OMG...someone shoot me, I'm on a rampage! | ||||||
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Friday, December 13, 2013, 6:02:55 AM- Not a very good prank. | ||||||
Earlier at work, one of the officers I work with told me he was getting some coffee and asked me if I wanted any tea. I told him that some decaf green tea would be nice. **We have a Keurig Coffee/Tea Machine in the office** He said that in his opinion the other tea had a better taste. He laughed when I told him that with the natural energy that I have, I would be climbing the walls and I would be even goofier than I usually am, not to mention running around more than usual. So I told him that caffeine would not be good for me. He brought me back the tea and of course I drank it. Well, he thought it would be funny to serve me the caffeinated tea. And yes, not even half way through it, I was spinning! Not only did my energy pick up in an unnatural way, but I also felt sick to my stomach, had a major headache, my heart rate didn't feel right and I was irritatingly jumpy. I confronted him and asked him if he had given me the caffeinated tea and he told me he had and then laughed. He wanted to see just how goofy I would get. I was furious! The words I used on him were: Careless, inconsiderate, cruel, ignorant and dangerous. I suggested he leave and not be around me for a few days because in my opinion, it wasn't a very funny prank. If your body has adjusted to caffeine, then more power to you. I had a a few sips of coffee many years ago. I was a nervous wreck and paranoid for hours and wanted to cry. There is a reason I don't drink caffeine. It makes me sick and I don't like the affects it has on my body. I know my body and what should or shouldn't go into it. He served me the tea at 1300 and now a little close to 8 hours later, I am feeling better. | ||||||
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Thursday, December 12, 2013, 9:30:39 PM- 2 Words | ||||||
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Thursday, December 12, 2013, 5:30:15 AM- The Holy Manger. | ||||||
For the first 16 years of my life, I attended 3 different religious functions each week. Sunday was for Catholic Mass (Dads side), Wednesday was for Protestant studies (Moms side) and Saturday mornings were for Christian Bible reading. My Dad didn't want to pigeon hole us into one religion. He wanted us to be able to make up our minds once we became adults. So I guess you can say, I'm capable of discussing religion correctly. I am not an overly zealous religious fanatic. I am more spiritual now than I am religious. I don't need a building or feel the need to give my paycheck away in order for God to be there. Anyhoo, on to my blog. Haps had a funny blog about the manger and it reminded me of my eldest son. Even though my boys were raised in the Presbyterian faith, my eldest became an Atheist when he was able to decide what he wanted. I was not disappointed. He is capable of making up his own mind. That is how I raised him and I do not love him any less. Because he is an Atheist, he makes jokes about religion and we make jokes about Atheism. One of the jokes he started to play was when he was 17 years old. During that year, at Christmas time, I was walking by the manger scene that was on the fireplace mantel and out of the corner of my eye, I saw a Lego man in place of the Baby Jesus. The Baby Jesus was standing up next to the lamb.....hahaha. I cracked up laughing and replaced the Baby Jesus and went about my day. A few hours later, I found an Army Man in the manger....lol. My son would do these exchanges when no one was looking. We cracked up with what he would put there. Almost 13 years later, when I visit the house that I shared with the Hubs at the time, my son still sneaks in and exchanges the Baby Jesus. Last year he was doing it with food. One time, I found a baby carrot in its place. We never know what to expect in the manger and we can't seem to catch him doing it...tee hee hee. Thank God he doesn't have a tiny Godzilla or else that would have already been in the manger. | ||||||
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Wednesday, December 11, 2013, 4:50:24 AM- Medic!!! | ||||||
Sad news. One of the cow socks suffered an injury. Thank God it wasn't fatal. I take all of the blame. As I was putting on my sock, I pulled too hard and its little tail came off. I quickly checked her pulse...no shock and no blood loss. Surgery is tomorrow. It's resting comfortably on my foot and doesn't seem to be in any pain. I know that many of you want my cow socks and will probably find me unfit to have them now. If you call the authorities and try to have them removed from the home, I will fight all of you in court! | ||||||
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Tuesday, December 10, 2013, 10:24:02 PM- Classic! | ||||||
Girl's reaction to her 3 friends getting engaged is priceless. Glamour: Glamour.com; By Kim Fusaro Look, I looooove engagement season for obvious reasons, but even I can admit I'm like, "Really, AGAIN?" when yet ANOTHER engagement ring pops up in my news feed. Seriously, there were two this weekend. (Congrats, Gemma and Danny!) How is everyone STILL getting engaged? Clearly the girl in this photo feels the same way. I don’t really know the context of the photo—which was submitted by Reddit user Moth_ladder over the weekend, although I’d probably do the same thing if someone tried to make me pose for this pic. Like, I’m happy for you. But I don’t need to pose for a photo to show off YOUR ring, ya know? --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Observation: The look on her face is faaaaantastic! I see no jealousy in this young woman's eyes. I see a woman who seems to be sickened by all of the fake sugary smiles. I wonder if she will be invited to the weddings? | ||||||
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Tuesday, December 10, 2013, 6:28:33 AM- Sister T. called. | ||||||
Ready? lol......I was. I am always ready for my sisters. Sister T: I think I used cheap duct tape to cover the leak on the pipe under the sink. It's still dripping. Me: T, you have to use a special kind of tape on the inside of the pipe. Not the outside. It's white or blue and is called Telfon or Plumbers Tape. Sister T: I did see that at the Home Depot, but it was too thin. Me: T, that is the point, you have to wrap the tape around the fitting. Sister T: But why can't I do that with the duct tape? Me: Because the Teflon Tape is thin and and threads the pipe to fill in the leaks. Sister T: I have to thread the pipe? Like sewing? I don't have those tools. Me: *laughing* *still laughing* *more laughing* Is E home? (her son) Put him on the phone. Sister T: E doesn't know how to sew a pipe, why talk to him? I love her. | ||||||
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Monday, December 9, 2013, 7:07:40 PM- This is one of those 'What in the !!!!!!!' moments. | ||||||
Time has issued the nominations of "Person of the Year" What kind of messed up world do we live in when Miley Cyrus is put on the same list as Pope Francis? Am I the only person who finds this disgusting? Pope Francis 'Humanitarian' = Person of the Year. Miley Cyrus 'Twerks' = Human Spectacle of the Year. *walks away shaking head* | ||||||
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Monday, December 9, 2013, 5:47:05 AM- Pots and Pans and simple pleasures. | ||||||
I was talking with my best friend earlier and she was telling me how her little one is crawling and barely walking now. This means he is getting into things around the house. She has blocked off everything and has put cabinet locks on all of the cupboards. I suggested that she let little C. play in the bottom pots and pan cupboard. Unfortunately, she can't because her pots are glass and her kitchen utensils are metal. When my oldest was crawling, his favorite place to play was in the kitchen. He would invade the bottom kitchen cupboards and cover the kitchen floor with pots, pans, dish washing towels and wooden kitchen utensils. I could do my cooking/baking, wash the windows, the laundry (right off to the kitchen) and clean the bathroom, which was also right off the kitchen. I didn't care that on a daily basis I would have to pick up the kitchen. It made the two of us happy and he was content. About the time my youngest began to crawl and then walking, he had fun ripping apart the bottom hall closets and pulling out the towels, linens, vacuum bags and various brooms. Again, this was perfect. While he was busy making a mess of what he thought was fun, I was busy cleaning another bathroom, the bedrooms and folding clothes on the beds. As soon as my first child came along, I put the bad stuff high in the cabinets. I had no idea that it would play out in my favor. It was fortuitous that it worked out the way that it did. All of the good stuff that was deemed exciting from a child's point of view, was on the bottom and saved me worry about where the boys would be or what they were doing. Who needs toys when there are linens to mess up & roll around in and pots to stack & clang together? | ||||||
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Sunday, December 8, 2013, 9:24:56 PM- John | ||||||
[img]http://userserve-ak.last.fm/serve/_/2966985/John+Lennon.jpg[/img] "You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one" John Lennon. He was right. I'm still a dreamer. You didn't have to be a teenager during the bombardment of the Beatles invasion, to understand and admire Johns messages to the world. I will always admire, respect and love who he was. | ||||||
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